It's all about ENVY!!
is only one rule when it comes to tailgating and it's
pretty simple. ENVY! If people are walking by you,
wishing they were doing what you're doing, then you're
a Professional Tailgater.
has put together a list of 5 Important "ENVY"
factors to consider for the professional tailgater.
When it comes to tailgating it pays to think like a Hobbit,
Sure you've had breakfast but have you had "Second
Breakfast?" Like the saying goes "Eat, Drink
and be Merry", and Stuffing yourself with delicious,
elaborate, enviable foods is as much a part of tailgating
as the game itself.
are a couple of things to consider when choosing food
for your Tailgate Party. The first thing, and it should
be obvious to you by now is.....ENVY, Yes I said ENVY.
Simply Cooking Hot Dogs won't do. Sure they taste good,
sure they're easy and cheap, but that is not what tailgating
is about! No one is going to walk by your tailgate party,
see you chomping on a hot dog and go WOW I should have
done that! On the other hand, picture foot long Chilidogs
piled high with kraut, slaw, or other similar enviable
toppings, or Super Nachos piled a mile high with Jalapeno's,
beef, beans, sour cream! YEEEAAAH that's what it's all
Try to choose foods that look elaborate but are actually
simple, that way your tailgate parties wont consume you
with "WORK". Face it, you can serve the best
foods at your tailgate party but if you're spending all
your time preparing them, NOBODY is going to envy you!
A perfect example of an easy tailgating food that looks
elaborate and evokes envy is Kabobs. Sure they look complicated,
but almost all of the prep can be done at home before
you leave. Yet as you grill them, the sight, smell, and
sound of them sizzling on your grill will instill ENVY
even in such seasoned tailgating professionals as John
is a list of fairly simple Tailgating foods that are sure
to instill ENVY into your tailgating neighbors,
(Precook them at home or buy them already
cooked and heat them up on the grill)
Turkey Legs (same strategy as ribs)
Deep Fried Turkey
Finger Foods (Nuts, Party trays, Cookies,
this list is not complete. Use your imagination. There
are thousands of delicacy's just waiting to be discovered
as great tailgating foods.
Another thing to consider when preparing good eats for
your tailgate party is QUANTITY. It is worth the extra
money to have too much food. A good rule to remember is
"The more food, the more envy"; you can bring
extra food home, but you can't eat what's not there. DO
NOT RUN OUT OF FOOD! And this brings us to our next envy
factor. Because The only thing worse than running out
of food at a tailgate party, is running out of Drinks
Drinks: Beer is great, but have you looked around
at a tailgate party? Everyone has a beer. Where's the
Envy in that? The only people envying the beer drinkers
are the homeless! If you must do beer, then only a keg
will do! A keg is sure to stir feelings of envy in the
diehard beer drinkers. Want more envy? Buy a power inverter
for your Tailgating Vehicle and bring a Blender! Make
sure it's a noisy blender too. Imagine the stares of ENVY
you'll receive as you start your loud blender, slushing
up that first pitcher of Margaritas! AHHHHHH! SOUNDS LIKE
a Damon Wayans movie, MORE ENVY, MORE ENVY. And be sure
to use an inverter not a generator or the only sounds
your neighbors will be hearing will be the sound of a
gasoline generator spewing carbon monoxide into your party!
Another great drink option is Homebrewed beer or wine,
your tailgating buddies are sure to turn green from either
Envy or the putrid taste of your foul concoctions. Can't
make homebrew? Buy some cheap wine and pour it into a
jug and say you made it.
Location, Location, Location: Choose a spot that has
lots of other fans around. After all if no one can see
you, no one can Envy you, and if you're doing it right;
the more people that see you, the more that will Envy
you! Consider a spot near the stadium if on-site parking
is not available. A tailgate that is not within site of
the stadium just doesn't feel right. Put yourself in the
line of fire. Try to locate where Lots of folks walking
to the stadium have to walk right by your tailgate. MORE
ENVY, MORE ENVY.
Socialize: Choose a parking lot (and space) that allows
you to interact with other tailgaters. This is one of
the finer points of tailgating. If you're going to tailgate
alone, just drink beer in your home backyard instead.
Socializing can spur some of the most concentrated Envy
imaginable. Introduce yourself to those around you. Talk
to them, sit with them, and drink with them. Why do you
think it's called a party?
Share: What better way to show off all of your tailgating
libations than offering them to others. After mixing up
that pitcher of team colored margaritas share them with
your neighbors. And they're sure to envy those Kabobs
even more after they've tasted them!